Being a parent is already difficult for two people and can be draining on some days. But what about single mums? Here are some tips on how to get through the bad days and be happy as a single mum.

 

Single mothers and their children can be just as happy as couples; there are many examples that prove this. A single mum should hold on to such examples when raising children, job and life seem to be getting on top of her. Use good examples of single mums as positive inspiration and think of them on the more difficult days.

There's no getting round a good schedule. If you have an understanding boss, you should not shy away from co-ordinating nursery or school time with your working hours. If this is not possible, you can look for a longer-term job that fits in better with your schedule or find a reliable person to pick up the child from school or nursery.

Take some time for yourself. Find a babysitter from time to time and just do something for yourself. Parenting is hard, especially alone; as a single mum, you deserve a break more often. And afterwards, you'll look forward to spending time with your child all the more. If a babysitter is too expensive, perhaps you can work together with another mum so that each of you can look after both children.

A major problem for single parents is the unreliability of the other parent. The father promises to come and then doesn't have time. Don't despair about this, it's best to prepare for failure in advance and not plan for it one hundred per cent. The father has to adapt to your life with the child, not the other way round. Concentrate on what kind of mother you are and don't worry about whether the father isn't a good father.

It's easy to lose control occasionally when everything becomes too much. Even if your child is being naughty again, don't shout at them or you'll feel guilty afterwards. Leave the room, take a deep breath and count to 10. Once the acute attack is over, you will find it much easier to deal with the situation.

Don't take on too much. You can't possibly do everything at once. The important thing is to look after your child, then you can do the housework. Leave the toys scattered on the floor for a day if you have too much to do. Nobody gives you points for your tasks except yourself; you can also forgive yourself if you haven't done everything you set out to do. A relaxed attitude frees you from the pressure you put yourself under.

If you don't get on well with your ex, leave the child out of it. Instead, give him good examples of when a man is helpful. Just because things didn't work out with the child's father doesn't mean that all men are bad, at least the child shouldn't grow up like that.

As you live alone with the child, no one else can pat you on the back but yourself. So if you have managed to get the child dry on your own, you can feel proud. All the child's good achievements are part of your efforts, feel good about it because you deserve it.

To save yourself stress when travelling, prepare yourself well, even if you are only going shopping with your child. Always have a packed bag with snacks and drinks as well as toys, clean spare clothes and wet wipes.

Try to multitask where you can. For example, you can combine some housework with playtime so that you don't have to do everything when the child is in bed. The hoover can become a fun game if the child is involved.

Don't forget that raising children alone is difficult, but it's worth the effort. A special relationship develops between mother and child when there are only two of them. Everything in life that is good takes effort, but you will be richly rewarded afterwards.