When children are bullied at school by classmates, it's a serious matter. If your child is the victim of bullying, it can have serious consequences. The child suffers humiliation, which in the worst case can lead to suicide or running amok.

 

 

As children don't always tell their parents what is happening at school, look out for changes in behaviour to find out if your child is a victim of bullying or if they are bullying their classmates themselves.

In today's world, extreme bullying can be life-threatening or cause lifelong social and psychological trauma to the victim.

 

If your child bullies other classmates

 

If you suspect or even know that your child is being bullied, help them to stop bullying for the sake of their classmates, but also so that your child doesn't get into trouble. Change the pattern of behaviour at home. Provide the child with a safe and loving environment without overwhelming them with love. Show your child respect and praise them for their successes. Show the child that you have confidence in them and treat them with respect. A child who is constantly patronised and not taken seriously tends to suppress weaker children in order to build up their own self-esteem.

 

Discuss the bullying behaviour with the child so that they understand that bullying other pupils is unacceptable and will be punished.

Give the child the opportunity to play team sports or co-operative tasks in groups with older children. A child who bullies weaker children feels superior. If they are surrounded by children of a similar age, they are less dominant and learn to work together with others as a team.

 

Show your child that they are important and listen to what they have to say.

 

If your child is unwilling to cooperate, talk to a doctor or a child psychologist about the problem. With professional help, it may be possible to identify and eliminate the cause of the misbehaviour. Also ask teachers and other parents to report back to you if your child continues to bully or if his or her behaviour towards classmates improves. A meeting with the parents of the bullying victims may help to resolve problems between the children. Make it clear to the other parents that you want to tackle the problem and remain cool and objective in the face of aggressive accusations.

 

 

If your child is the victim of bullying

 

Observe your child's behaviour at home to see if they show any signs of being bullied at school. It is often the case that a child will not tell you at home if they are being bullied. Try to find out if your child is a victim by asking questions, but do so gently. Victims of bullying feel humiliated and do not like to rekindle the feeling of humiliation by talking to their parents.

 

Offer the child a safe home, especially if you want to talk about bullying. Make it clear to the child that it is not their fault if they are being bullied.

 

Under no circumstances should you teach the child to fight back by hitting them, as this can make matters worse. Instead, send your child to activities where they are with groups of slightly younger children or children of the same age. In a group with younger children, your child will feel more confident and may even develop leadership skills. Music, sports and artistic activities boost self-esteem and combat depression.

 

Notify the teachers at school and be persistent, because unfortunately many teachers do not take bullying seriously enough.

 

Meet with the parents of the bullies and explain the situation, but without aggression. Try to clarify the problems between the children.