Our eldest daughter was born in 1971. When I went on maternity leave, my father, with whom I worked in a haulage company, asked me if I would continue to work after the birth, because my mother could take care of the child. This was not how my husband and I had imagined it! Since the possibility of working from home was not so widespread in the past, I suggested to my father that he wait and see, and if possible, do some paperwork at home. My father agreed.

When our daughter was 3 months old, I started working from home. I thought I was lucky to have got such an opportunity. It went well for exactly two months. Then one evening I got a call from my mum saying that she wanted to prepare me for the fact that the boss at the haulage company had sacked me. I no longer understood the world, because I had done a good job and had done nothing wrong. Even when my parents came round later, I didn't get a clear answer or a letter of dismissal.

When my husband heard the story, he went to see a lawyer the next day to find out about the legal situation. He said quite openly that the matter was rotten. I then learnt that, in addition to the statutory 8 weeks of maternity leave, I had 4 months' protection against dismissal and that I was entitled to pay for this time. We confronted my father with this fact, whereupon he became very aggressive. But I insisted on my rights. At the time, we didn't understand what role my father played in all of this.

A few months later, I bumped into my former boss by pure chance. For a split second, I thought about just walking past. But then we said hello and she said that she and her husband were very sorry that I hadn't come back. When I replied that her husband had told me through my father that I had been discharged, we decided to go for a coffee and talk about it. And then I found out that my father had told them that I wouldn't be coming back after my maternity leave. He had also submitted a letter of resignation from me, which I had never written. My father must have paid for the two months of working from home out of his own pocket and as this would have come out at some point, I was "dismissed" without further ado. He just hadn't reckoned with our resistance.
During our conversation, I asked my former boss to let the matter rest.

I then drove to my parents' house and confronted my father - without my mother being present - about the outcome of the conversation. The reason he gave for his behaviour was that he and his wife had fared badly in the war and he thought my husband and I should learn to fight too. We shouldn't have roast pigeons flying into our mouths. So the whole thing was basically directed against my husband! I was almost sick with anger. I told my father that only the fact that he was my father would stop me from going to the labour court. Maybe he would have lost his job, maybe my parents' marriage would have fallen apart, but that price was too high for me. And I realised at that moment that my father was a man who spoke up for his family, but at the same time tried to manipulate people to his advantage.

I swore at that moment that I would never set foot in an office to work again. I have kept that vow to this day.

After the birth of my second daughter, I got a job on a farm near our home. My duties were very varied and I was treated like a member of the family. I worked there for 28 years until my husband retired and we moved away.
When my mother-in-law died, I mourned her for a long time, but when my father died 11 years ago, my grief was limited. I was never able to forgive him for his behaviour.
My mistake before this story was that I trusted my father and didn't think he was mean.