You've broken up and you seem to be treading water. Can't you find the right partner for you? Maybe you're still too attached to your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. If you're still mourning your old relationship, you're automatically sabotaging any chance of finding new love. How do you recognise that you still have feelings for your old flame and how do you get over it?

You regret breaking up with him:

When you have ended the relationship, your memories may be more beautiful than they were before the break-up. This doesn't mean that you two were meant to be together or that it was a mistake to break up.

Part of the overcoming process is admitting that there were good and bad times in the relationship. It's important to look at it as objectively as possible. Don't switch off all the bad memories just to remember the good. Try to get a balanced perspective of your former relationship.

You wanted to stay friends:

You can't force a friendship. Neither with a complete stranger from the street nor with an ex-partner. Even if it seems like a good idea to stay friends after breaking up, in reality this friendship will prevent you from moving on. It's absolutely right to wish your former partner well and not see him/her again for a while until you're really over the relationship.

You compare new people with your ex:

If you really want to look forward, you have to look at new people from a new perspective. At first, someone new can seem very strange to you, but as you get to know them better, these things suddenly become endearing.

You just have to give yourself and him/her a chance. So instead of looking for similarities between the old relationship and the new one, get to know the new person first. Even if you find out that it's not the right partner for you, make the decision for the right reasons, namely based on the person's character, not on the similarities or dissimilarities with your ex.

Your ex-partner will find someone new faster than you:

The last time you saw him/her, you were begged not to break up. That's why the shock of seeing him/her with a new partner is all the greater. What's more, it's human to desire something you can no longer have. As hard as this may sound, be happy for your ex-partner.

And then go out and meet new people! Start off easy to rebuild your ego and test your market value. See your ex as a lesson on the right path.

You don't want to go out at all:

When you're free on the market again, you may find it difficult at first to feel as at ease as you did with your old partner. But don't misinterpret this to mean that your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend was the one for you. A change in a relationship means that everything is new and different, so it's normal to feel insecure at first.

But going out again and meeting new people is the only way to find the right person for you.