How do you become successful? There are people for whom everything seems to come their way, while others struggle and never seem to get anywhere. If you want to be one of those people who can sit back, relax and look back on a successful life in their twilight years, I'll show you how you can do it.
You have to be prepared to make sacrifices in order to be successful
The most important thing here is, of course, that I have enough willpower and am prepared to work towards my goals. I can do anything, I just have to want it, and want it enough.
The principle seems to be easier for children. For example, they want nothing more than the latest console, and they are prepared to make a lot of sacrifices for it. If their parents tell them they'll get their console if they get an A in their next maths test, they'll sit down and cram until they get their A home.
As adults, we seem to lose that. It's too easy to say 'oh, I can't afford it' or 'I don't have time for it'. But the truth is that we don't want it enough, that it's not a high priority in our lives. So when you set your goals, be sure that you only set your sights on what you really want. Then you will achieve it.
Your goals determine how successful you are
There are no standards for distinguishing who is successful in life and who is not. Success is your own value system, and everyone has an individual value system.
On the path to success, you need to realise what your exact goals in life are, what embodies such a high value for you that you want to achieve it.
Let's take person A, for example: He really wants to make a career and get a high-paying job. That is his top priority. So he studies hard at school and later works hard to climb the career ladder until he reaches his goal. He won't be satisfied until he's working 16 hours a day as a top manager somewhere so that he can afford everything he wants.
Person B is completely different: he doesn't want to work at all. He detests everything that has to do with work. But he is prepared to lower his standards so that he doesn't have to work. He doesn't need a car and is happy to spend the day lazing around and meeting up with his mates in the pub.
Person A probably leads a more comfortable life because he doesn't have to worry financially. However, he has to work hard to achieve his goal.
Person B, on the other hand, cannot afford to make any big leaps, but enjoys absolute freedom.
Both people have their own personal value system and as long as they achieve it and it's really what they want (just don't fool yourself), they are both successful people.
Find your value system
So now to you. Find out what your personal value system is.
Values are priorities that tell you how you spend every day, every moment.
Make a list of what your values are, your short-term goals and your long-term goals and never lose sight of them. You don't have to live by this list forever, because your values can change over time.
Other goals come to the fore and become a priority. If you don't focus on the goals that are really important to you, some of them will fade or even disappear completely.
This price is too high. One person, for example, has a fantastic career but has not started a family, even though it is an important value for him. Another gets married and starts a family, but doesn't manage to lose the 30kg that is so important for his self-esteem.
As a child, an acquaintance of mine had resolved that he would own his favourite car, a Porsche, until he was 35. There was hardly anything more important to him in the world. He actually worked towards it his whole life, achieving other goals along the way, and by the time he was 34 he had his own house and money in his bank account.
He could have gone straight to the dealer to buy a Porsche in the lower price range, then he would have fulfilled his childhood dream.
But in the meantime, there were other things that had risen in his value system. He decided that the Porsche could wait and that he would rather invest the money again instead of spending it. He put all his energy into finding an investment that was profitable enough so that he would be able to afford his Porsche and other things in a few years' time.
It is also important to update your list and set a new goal every time you reach one.
If you consciously change your value system, your behaviour will change and with it the result. For example, if your most important goal to be successful is physical fitness, but you are already exceptionally fit, you can replace 'fitness' with 'wealth'. You may not be able to exercise as much for a while and your fitness may suffer slightly because you are now using your energy to improve your financial situation.
Wealth has replaced fitness at the moment, but this only needs to be short-term. When you have accumulated enough wealth, you can concentrate fully on your fitness again, because then wealth will no longer be at the top of your list.
But if you always have 'fitness' at the top of your list, you won't have the energy to realise other goals. You will then be in top shape all your life, but not satisfied with the rest of your life.
Let me briefly summarise once again:
Step 1: Brainstorm your personal goals that are important to you in order to be successful
Step 2: Reduce each value to as few words as possible. So instead of 'I would like to lose 39 kg', simply say '30 kg off'. This is important so that the list remains clear and you can see your values at a glance.
Step 3: Set priorities. Write down your values in the order in which they are important to you. Start with the question: 'If I could have one of these things immediately, what would I choose', etc.
Step 4: Review values. Go through your list and find out whether all the values actually represent your wishes, or whether some of them are "expected of us" and we therefore think we have to achieve them. Be absolutely honest with yourself.
When you look back at your first list of values in a few years' time, you will realise how much you have achieved. The many small values add up to an overall picture of your personal success. After you have always focussed on your most important values at the time and have achieved and ticked them off, you will know what it is like to be successful. There is no better reward than patting yourself on the back when you really deserve it.
