With all the rumours of conspiracy theories circulating, I sometimes think about the sense or nonsense in life. So the question keeps coming back to me: What the hell do you use a bidet for?

Option 1For washing your feet. A wonderful washbasin to quickly rinse off smelly feet without having to climb into the shower.

Option 2: Multi-purpose cleaning for children under 7. Not only is a bidet the perfect height for toddlers to do their business and wash their hands and face in, it is also ideal as a bath for children under 3.

Option 3Vaginal irrigation after unprotected intercourse. Vaginal douching is supposed to be a contraceptive method.

Option 4: Newspaper rack. How practical, as the bidet is always right next to the toilet.

Option 5Storage space. A storage space for dirty laundry, beauty utensils or toilet paper. With a little tidying, everything fits in the bidet.

Option 6As a step. Ideal for reaching higher shelves or replacing light bulbs.

Option 7Washing facilities for pets.

Option 8For chilling drinks (see picture).